Spoken
by Supreme Master Ching Hai, Malaysia, February 25, 1992
(Originally in English) Videotape No. 219
Some
people are wise from having experienced difficult marriages in the
past. So they avoid marriage now, and maybe become monks because of
that. They probably have had enough experience in marriage, and don't
need any more experience in such study or experimentation. So they
do not marry in this lifetime. They feel satisfied alone.
But
if you are already married, try to stick with one partner. It doesn't
matter how hard it is. For example, I heard that Tolstoy had a very
difficult wife. And one day when he was talking to his friend, his
wife was showing him up terribly. She was degrading him and making
him feel humiliated in front of his friend.
So
his friend said, "You are bigger than she is. She's only a small
thing. Why don't you just show that devil what force you have and
be done with it! How can you put up with all this?" Tolstoy said,
"Shhh! Don't talk too loud. I tried that before, in the last
life. That's why I have 'double income' now! I'd better not do it
again, otherwise I will have triple income in the next life."
He said, "I have to put up with it. Because if I do that again,
I'll never get out." He knew it would be triple income and more,
all the time. Therefore he tried to put up with it.
If
you have a so-called terrible partner and you feel you need her after
all, then it is your last life connection with each other. You have
to pay for it. So try to bear it and do whatever you can, with all
your might, to satisfy that person in order to pay the debt quickly.
The best way to get rid of the enemy is make him your friend. The
best way to get rid of a terrible wife is to please her, or a terrible
husband is to please him, to submit to all his demands. And then he
will become your friend.
